God's Mercy, My Need

In the past week, I have been reading the book of Nehemiah. It has been an awakening of sorts for me. Over the years when I have done the Bible through in a year, I have read through this book. But, for some reason, this time it has hit me in a way that is truly from God.

In the 9th chapter, there is a prayer of sorts where the people of Israel are reminded of their continual falling away from the Lord. And then they are reminded of the continual mercy that has been given to them by their heavenly Father. Over and over again, the auther goes through the sequence of events and it always ends with God's undying mercy.

This has been the saga of my life too. Over and over again, God in His mercy has pulled me out of the pit of sin and despair because of His love and mercy. I would rise up out of the pit and then for a season of time, I would walk close to His side. Then as time would go by, something or some one would entice me away from His side and I would once again slide back into the pit. But, God never leaves those that He loves. And oh how He has proven His love for me.

As I think over these things I wonder why it is that I fall away. I wonder what would ever cause me to leave the one that loves my soul. The wicked one, who entices me to fall uses those areas of my personality that are easily moved. I must put myself into the hands of the only one who can overcome the evil one. Jesus, who conquered sin and death when He surrendered Himself for my sake. Oh how great is His love and His mercy.

My view today is one of light. The light of God's love. The light of God's mercy. And His never ending promise that He will never leave me nor forsake me. I pray that today - I can walk in the light of His love and to accept the gift of Mercy that has taken care of all of my need.

A Little Leaven

Mark 8:10-13 "And straightway he entered into a ship with his disciples, and came into the parts of Dalmanutha. 11 And the Pharisees came forth, and began to question with him, seeking of him a sign from heaven, tempting him. 12 And he sighed deeply in his spirit, and saith, Why doth this generation seek after a sign? verily I say unto you, There shall no sign be given unto this generation. 13 And he left them, and entering into the ship again departed to the other side."

I don't think until today that I ever noticed the phrase "And he sighed deeply in his spirit...". Jesus was frustrated by the questions and doubts of the Pharisees and also of his own disciples. Deep in his soul he was touched with the pain of rejection. And I found today that I have also caused Him the pain deep in his soul because I too have been like the Pharisees.

How easy it was to play for the wrong audience. I realize that I have sought the approval of those around me and of those that I love more than the approval of the "Lover of my Soul". I Corinthians 5:6 says "Your boasting is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump of dough?" I allowed myself to get caught up in pleasing the world around me. And it took me down.

As I sat in church today, I came to the point where I saw myself for who I am today - and who I long to become tomorrow. I have been a modern day Pharisee. Tomorrow I long to be a daughter of the King. May my focus be on living a life that is true to the Word of God and that I may be found well pleasing by my Father.