Bittersweet Parting

1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 "Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. 14We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. 15According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. 16For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. 17After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. 18Therefore encourage each other with these words."

A saint has gone home to be with the Lord. And we who knew her grieve our loss but praise God for the healing that our dear sister, Nancy has received. Even now we can picture her going from friend to friend in heaven asking all kinds of questions in the style that Nancy was known for.

I remember when I first met her. My Geoff was in first grade at Mt. Calvary Christian School and Nancy was the 2nd grade teacher. She had a way about her with children. They flocked to her - even though she was a very strict disciplinarian. The kids knew where they stood with her all the time. And they respected and loved her for it. Geoff and his friends were the last 2nd grade class Nancy taught before she became the elementary principal. She always said that class was the one that brought her teaching career to an end. Not sure what she meant by that! :)

When I was working at the school Nancy would periodically come up to my office to visit or check on the status of one of the kids that she was concerned about. More often than not though, I know she was coming to see how I was. Nancy knew that I was struggling with deep problems. Never one to pry, she just would hug me and let me know that I was loved. I missed her when I left the school.

Years passed when I was in the dark time of my great sadness. I often would ask about her and was saddened when I learned that she was diagnosed with cancer. Through it all she continued to minister and work with the children at the school until the treatments and the illness just made it too difficult to continue. It was a sad day for Mt. Calvary when Nancy left her little office for the last time. I have such fond memories of her office with her collection of pigs on the shelves and window sills. Such a cheery place where even the worst offender could find both correction and love.

Just two short months ago we had a surprise birthday party for our friend. She was good that Saturday. Laughing, asking questions about the kids and rejoicing in the fact that I had found my way back from the darkness. It was a wonderful afternoon and something that I will cherish as I go through the years to come.

Hard as it is to say goodbye we are not like those who have no hope. As much as Nancy loved her family and her children at the school - she loved her Lord most of all. And now, she is with Him. I can imagine her looking at His face and asking to see the nail prints in His hand. I can hear her praising Him for His forgiveness and mercy. And I can imagine her looking at us and thinking "just wait till you get to come home!"

We will miss you dear friend! But, we are so thankful that you are even now dancing on the streets of heaven.

Idolatry - a Subtle Foe

I have decided to share my heart at a deeper level. In recent posts I have drawn from events that have surrounded my life but have rarely delved into the inner work that God is doing in my life. Perhaps it will be of no other value than to give me a way to verbalize what I am sensing God is teaching but if it can give anyone else aid then I will see that as a blessing.

Idolatry is a harsh word. And it is one that I believe I have misled myself about all of these years. I wanted to believe that I was not an idolater. And I based that opinion solely on the fact that I never bowed down and worshipped any type of idols. But in recent months I have found myself staring into the mirror and seeing that the very darkness of my heart is wrapped in the cloak of a foe that hides itself in different disguises. Idolatry none-the-less.

Deuteronomy 6:5 "Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength."

This verse makes it very clear to me what idolatry is. Anything that diminishes the love that I have for God is idolatry. WOW! Just let that sink in for a minute. How in the world is it that God commands me to love Him with all my heart and with all my soul and with all my strength and then to love my neighbor as myself? How is that possible?

In and of my own strength it is not possible. My life story has proven that out. In my quest to "love my neighbor" I have allowed that love to become the end in and of itself. What has become most important to me is approval. I have sought the approval of others to the exclusion of being in relationship with the God I purport to love. Many of the choices I have made have come from an unwillingness to truly love God and to let go of the affirmation and love of those who have brought pain and sorrow to my life.

This is the highest form of idolatry. When I put the opinions and approval of others before my love of God and the desire to be obedient to His Word I have become an idolater. This is where my great sorrow comes from. Now - to press into change.

A Lesson from "24"

“Can you believe it?” Andy asked me on Monday morning. “What a shocker! I never would have guessed it of Tony” I replied. In case you are wondering what we were talking about it was the unbelievable turn of events on the TV series “24”. All season long we unwary watchers had been roped into believing that Tony Almeda was a good guy – out to save America from all the ills of terrorism and its accompanying pain. Little did we know that the writers of the program took our natural inclination to judge people based on their outward appearance and actions to dupe us into believing that Tony would be there during Jack and America’s darkest hour.

Within a five minute window of time, Tony went from hero to assassin, from friend to betrayer, from patriot to terrorist. It left me shaken and questioning my ability to really judge the intent of his heart.

The prophet Jeremiah spoke about this very thing when he wrote “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” Humanly speaking we are unable to understand the depth of the depravity of our own hearts let alone the state of another’s. This is why Jesus commanded that we were not to judge one another. He spoke of making sure that we deal with the log in our own eye before we try and extract the splinter from someone else’s.

It is not important what our perceptions are of others. What is important is the genuine honesty of our own heart. God looks at the heart while we look at outward appearances. When we strive to live up to expectations of others we are setting ourselves up for failure. And when others disappoint us we need to keep in mind that they too are frail and unable to meet our needs without the intervention of God in their lives.

God desires that we all come to him with a contrite heart, willing to change any of the deceitful ways that separate us from Him. It is only as we submit to the change that comes from walking in the Light that we will be less likely to judge others.

So next week when I turn on “24” I will look at Tony Almeda from a different view. I will no longer be so naïve that I believe his motives are pure. But then again maybe I won’t even care to question.

Father, teach us to examine our own hearts to ensure that we are walking in the Light of your Truth and in obedience to the way You would have us live. Help us to refrain from judging the thoughts and intents of the hearts of those we come in contact with. May we grow to trust in Your unfailing love.