Beanie

 

Today on the day before Mother's Day I am thinking about "Beanie." I never really knew the origin of the nickname that my mom had but her two brothers and her five sisters all called her that so I am pretty sure she was dubbed that when she lived "down home." 

When I look at this picture of my mom and my uncle Glenn it makes me smile. This would have been before she and my dad were married so I am thinking she was 18 or so.  It was World War II timeframe. 

Mom always said she felt gangly as a teenager. But I think she was beautiful. Her smile here is the same smile she had when she was 89. It was the smile she gave when she heard us come in the back door when we came home to the Valley.  It was the smile she gave when she saw her grandchildren and great grandchildren. It was the smile she gave when she welcomed family and friends into our family home. Her smile came straight from a happy and contented heart.

I miss Beanie. I miss being able to call her on the phone and hear her voice. I miss being able to pour out my heart about the things that matter and some things that don't and have her understand. I miss her telling me to "keep on keeping on" when the way gets wearying. I miss her prayers. She prayed for us all - every day and often many times during the day. I miss that when I needed prodding that she was willing to do it. 

I think about Mother's Day and how this is now my 10th one without her. I wish I had told her more often how much she meant to me. I wish I would have gone home more and spent time with her while I could. I wish I would have done more to have made her life easier. But I cannot go back. I can only remind myself how blessed I was to have this woman as my mom. And I pray that a little bit of "Beanie" comes through to her youngest child. Maybe in my smile. I love you Mom!